he didn't send me a christmas card

the mailman might have failed to deliver my card. but he knows me personally...
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he didn't send me a christmas card.

perhaps he had grown tired sending me one of his christmas cards, and scribbling the questions, where are you now and what are you doing with your life?

i would answer in march or april. fill my one page letter with stories that say a little of how i am or what i am going through in life. he would send an obligatory reply, of course, fill it also with stories of his days that tell nothing about how he really is.

the next year, the same process is repeated. both of us skirting to answer the question. perhaps we are afraid to even voice out the answer, unwilling to admit and hesitant to share.

what had kept us from revealing how we felt for each other? we looked into each other's eyes and for a fleeting moment, we both knew it was real.

but reality stepped in and we waved goodbye to each other instead, in fact, we were saying goodbye minutes after we met.

there are friendships that withstand time and distance. but people come and go, we grow, we change, we evolve. so do friendships and relationship. some fall by the wayside, some shift to other forms, others develop and mature.

but there are friendships that are hidden in our hearts, not diminished by time and distance and yet not nurtured enough to grow and take flight.